IELTS Free Online Writing Practice - Is society becoming more or less reliant on government assistance?

IELTS.WORK Free Online Writing Practice # 1712526687

Task 2 Topic: "Is society becoming more or less reliant on government assistance?"


Model Answer:
Over the past few decades, there has been a significant increase in the number of people who depend on government assistance for various reasons such as unemployment, disability, and poverty. Some argue that this reliance is growing due to factors like economic downturns, job outsourcing, and an aging population. Others contend that it is diminishing because of technological advancements and improvements in education. In this essay, I will examine both perspectives and provide my own analysis based on available evidence.

Firstly, it can be argued that society's reliance on government assistance has increased due to several factors. Economic downturns have led to a rise in unemployment rates, forcing many individuals to seek financial support from the state. For instance, the 2008 global recession resulted in massive job losses and affected millions of people worldwide. Additionally, job outsourcing has led to loss of employment opportunities in certain industries, particularly manufacturing. As a result, more workers find themselves needing government aid. Lastly, an aging population also contributes to this growing reliance, as older individuals often have limited income sources and require social security benefits or healthcare assistance.

On the other hand, some people believe that society's dependence on government aid is decreasing. One reason for this viewpoint is the rapid pace of technological advancements. As technology continues to develop, new industries are created, offering numerous job opportunities. For example, the rise of the internet and digital technologies has given birth to fields like software development, e-commerce, and data analytics, which have absorbed many of those previously unemployed individuals. Moreover, improvements in education systems across the globe have helped prepare people for the modern workforce, reducing the need for government support.

In conclusion, while it is true that some aspects of society may be contributing to increased reliance on government assistance, there are also factors working against this trend. Technological advancements and educational improvements appear to be offsetting some of these issues. However, without comprehensive data analysis, it remains difficult to determine whether overall dependence on government aid is rising or falling. Ultimately, the debate surrounding this topic requires further examination and research to draw definitive conclusions.

Overall Score: 9
For Task Response: 9 (The candidate has responded directly to all parts of the question and provided a detailed analysis.)
Coherence and Cohesion: 9 (The candidate's essay is well-structured, with clear arguments presented in a logical order, supported by relevant examples.)
Lexical Resource: 8 (The candidate uses a wide range of vocabulary, although some less common words may be slightly misused or not perfectly integrated into the context.)
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 9 (The candidate demonstrates an advanced level of grammar accuracy, with only minor errors that do not affect overall understanding.)
Presentation of Ideas: 8 (The candidate presents ideas in a clear and concise manner, although some sentences may be overly complex or lengthy.)

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