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IELTS Free Online Writing Practice - Is cultural assimilation necessary social cohesion?

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Task 2 Writing Topic: "Is cultural assimilation necessary for social cohesion?"

Model Answer:

Cultural assimilation is a process where individuals or groups of people gradually adopt the customs, language, and values of another culture in order to become more integrated into their new environment. While some argue that cultural assimilation is essential for social cohesion, others believe that maintaining one's own cultural identity can contribute to a more harmonious society. This essay will examine both perspectives and provide a conclusion based on the advantages and disadvantages of each approach.

On the one hand, cultural assimilation can lead to a stronger sense of social cohesion by creating a unified national or community identity. When people share common values, customs, and language, it becomes easier for them to communicate, understand, and empathize with each other. For example, immigrants who fully assimilate into the dominant culture are more likely to be accepted and welcomed by the local population, which can help reduce prejudice and discrimination. In addition, cultural assimilation can promote social cohesion by encouraging people from different backgrounds to work together towards a shared goal, such as national development or community progress.

However, maintaining one's own cultural identity can also contribute to social cohesion in a different way. By respecting and preserving the diverse cultures that exist within a society, people can learn from each other and create a more inclusive environment. For instance, multicultural societies tend to be more innovative and adaptable because they draw upon a wider range of ideas, perspectives, and experiences. Moreover, recognizing and celebrating cultural differences can help individuals develop a greater sense of self-awareness, self-esteem, and pride in their own heritage. This, in turn, can foster a stronger sense of belonging within the broader community.

In conclusion, while cultural assimilation may contribute to social cohesion by promoting a shared national or community identity, maintaining one's own cultural identity can also create a more inclusive and harmonious society. Both approaches have their merits, and the ideal solution may lie somewhere between these two extremes – a balance that respects and values cultural diversity while still fostering a sense of belonging and unity within the larger social fabric.

Total word count: 342

Scoring based on IELTS standards:

- Task Response: The essay clearly responds to the topic, presents both sides of the argument, and provides a conclusion (Band 9)
- Coherence and Cohesion: The paragraphs are well structured, with logical progression between ideas. Transitions are effective and the essay is easy to follow (Band 9)
- Lexical Resource: The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary, with most words being accurate in meaning (Band 8.5)
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The grammar is mostly complex and advanced, with only occasional minor errors (Band 9)
- Presentation of ideas: The writing is clear, concise, and precise, with effective use of connectors (Band 9)

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